Ok, I know this might seem a little weird, even for me. I am a big fan of Havi Brooks and she talks to her fear/monsters when she's stuck. Since Havi is the Queen of "destuckification", I thought maybe I would try having a conversation with my monster.
See, my problem lately has been with anger and irritation. I get angry and irritated over the smallest things. That in itself is soooo annoying.
In trying to get to the bottom of this, I had a conversation with my Monster. This is now it went.
Me: Hi Monster. I don't know what I'm supposed to call you.
Monster: You can call me Monster.
Me: Ok, so I have no idea how to have this conversation but I know it needs to happen.
Me: Anyway, I am wondering what's up with all the anger and irritation. Why do you insist on me responding to everything that way? It's a real bummer.
Me: Crap. I must be doing this wrong. Ok, I realize you are likely trying to protect me and I'm just wondering if that's true and what you might be protecting me from.
Monster: Duh. I'm protecting you from awareness.
Me: What!? I got an answer! …Long pause, while I think… Why would you protect me from awareness? I’m the Queen of awareness. I love awareness! Why do I need protecting from awareness?
Monster: Awareness opens doors. When doors are open, you walk through them. This makes me uncomfortable. You might get hurt.
Me: Wow. You really are trying to protect me. This is so strange and so cool.
Is there another way that I could be safe and still have awareness?
Monster: Sure. Stop taking so many risks.
Me: I’m not really willing to do that. I realize it makes you really uncomfortable but it’s how I grow. Maybe we can come up with a compromise?
Me: Can I just point out that I am more aware now that we’ve had this conversation and that nothing bad happened? Can you back off the anger and irritation just a little bit and see what happens?
Me: Ok. I can see you need a little more time to think this one through. I’m going to sleep now. Um, I guess we’ll talk another time.
Yes, it seems strange to me too. However, I have a bit more clarity and insight about my anger and irritation. This is a good thing. I definitely have more questions for my monster and I intend to have more conversations.
If you talk to your monsters, I would love to hear about it.